Q: Kim, Help! My life is falling apart.
A: Might it be falling apart, to fall back together, creating your truest life’s path?
One thing is constant in life: Change. It can be heartbreaking yet common to experience multiple life events that send us reeling out of control. A diagnosis, death, demotion, divorce, and a myriad of other life horrors or crises can require a crash course in resilience. Perspective, gratitude, viewing life as an experience, belief in a life path can all assist in turning “falling apart” to “falling into your path“.
A few quick questions that may get you from reeling to repairing:
1) List everything that is working.
2) Who or what can you count on? Take inventory of your resources. (for example, your best friend or your safe, comfy home)
3) What can you learn from this?
4) How might this be part of your life’s path?
Often in my life, I have been dangerously close to bitter not better, teetering on the edge and ready to fall into the dark and bottomless abyss. Time and again, I regain my grounding with this one simple but life affirming belief: Apparently, this is my life’s path. My life’s path includes my adversity, unique for me, and far from anything I would ever choose. After I lost my son Jack in 2004, I angrily thought “Why couldn’t I have just had a bitter divorce and bankruptcy?!” Then I realized some people had experienced all of the above and I know that is no small challenge either as it also involves loss and fear like other forms of crisis and adversity.
We will not get through life without hardship. I didn’t get to choose the challenge I thought I could handle best. I would do anything to have my son Jack in my life here on earth, but I didn’t get to choose the heartbreak in my life. Given your own life’s hardship or crisis at the moment (which can come from any and sometimes all directions at once) you may feel completely lost or hopeless, angry or devastated. Bitter is just one letter from better, but it can feel miles apart. It might require time, process, learning and planning to create the ‘falling back together’ feeling that can pull you out of dark times. For me, over time, I continued to learn resilience by losing a job I loved, friendships, career setback, and loss of my sister Kristen to cancer. If you, or someone you know, is feeling hit on all sides by life changing hardship, please reach out to me. I could go on for days with all I have learned and studied on resilience, and I feel it is also part of my life’s path to share it. I send love to all those hurting today and every day! May you find peace, alignment, and joy in the days to come.
To learn more about resilience and facing life’s hardship with compassion and empowerment, contact Kim at [email protected], (518) 301-3593.
