“To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.” ~ Oscar Wilde

 

 Self love is essential  for living well.  According to the late Louise Hay, an icon in the field of coaching, “We are divine expressions of life and we need to know that, experience it, rejoice in it.” We know this at the core of our being, but often wastes away buried deep beneath the clouded mind, steeped in insufficiency.  Our psyche or “ego”, a word commonly thought of as boastful, prideful or overly in love with self, is considered the mind’s voice of judgment, lack, comparison, doubt, and fear in the field of positive psychology and spirituality. Although we may think we are our thoughts, this voice of ego is not who we truly are but rather incessant chatter narrating the world around us.  In many cases, this narration can be unkind and may hold us from living fully.

From the ego, we live our lives in a place of lack and this includes a lack of self love. We may think we are not good enough, we don’t have enough, and that we are not enough. These thoughts are extremely common and viciously disempowering. Our ability to raise the level of consciousness in the world lies in our ability to believe the that we are all enough. We were born ‘enough’. We have everything we need.  This is the reality of our ‘being’ rather than our thinking.  When we live from our being, we are able to fulfill our potential, loving others and living with meaning and purpose, kindness and compassion.

Withholding love from ourselves, is not humility, but rather a barrier to loving others sufficiently. We are not fully loving others (children, spouses, parents, friends, mankind) if we do not love ourselves.  While we think it may be desirable to think less of or be unkind to ourselves, it is damaging.  We should never keep love from ourselves! When something goes wrong, do we beat ourselves up or give ourselves comfort?  By giving ourselves loving comfort and  understanding, we create a sanctuary that nurtures us and allows us to enjoy life.

For Valentine’s Day this year make a special effort to focus on self love and get at the heart of the art of loving yourself!

To examine your level of self love, ask yourself the following questions:

How kind am I to myself in my thoughts?

Do I spend time doing what I love?

Am I a good friend to myself?

Can I speak my truth?

The most successful and spiritual among us practice self love to ensure that their life’s path is not hindered by judgment, lack, comparison, and fear.  To learn more about how to nurture yourself and cultivate self love to live your best life, visit our website at www.center4c.com or contact us for life coaching programs and mind, body and soul activities.

 Helene Verdile and Kim Perone are Certified Life Coaches at The Center for Clarity, Compassion & Contentment at 801 Route 50 (behind Edward Jones), serving clients one-on-one and in group coaching programs and can be reached at [email protected], (518) 470-0048; [email protected] (518) 301-3593. Coaching programs include Power of YOU, Fearless: Anxiety Release, Joy Starts Here, Living by Design, Innerspace, Inspired Life Book Club, and Soul Sessions.